NASCAR on the radio?

I just overheard a discussion by two coworkers involving listening to NASCAR on the radio. I have to say, if there is any way to make an already dull event more dull, that has to be it.

Here's how I imagine radio NASCAR:

Announcer 1: And welcome back to the program. To those just joining us, the cars are making a left turn right now...

Announcer 2: Just a friendly reminder, this program brought to you by Slim Jims. If you're hungry and can't afford food, snap into a Slim Jim. And also by Hot Pockets. Whaddya gonna pick? Hoooot Pockets!

Announcer 1: Thank you, Dale. Now Jeff Gordon making a left turn, followed by Tony Stewart in the number 14 car. What do you think Dale, what's his next move?"

Announcer 2: Well Roger, if he goes with those instincts he's famous for, he will make a left turn with precision and speed, but he could always pull the wild card and make the power play, that being a left turn with slightly less precision and slightly more speed.

Announcer 1: Let's just hope he can keep that wheel cranked to the left, Dale. And now Dale Jr coming up in the pack, looks like he's going to go with a left turn maneuver in an attempt to outplay the competition.

Announcer 2: Dale Jr, as we know, the son of Dale Sr., God rest his soul. We'd like to observe the traditional moment of silence for Dale Sr. right now.

*one minute pause*

Announcer 2: And there we have it. Never a dry eye in the house. Oh! Roger, look at this, we've got Rusty Wallace throwing caution to the wind and coming up fast with a left turn. Unbelievable move, executed with brilliance. Really helped him gain those 5 spots, and I have to say, he has earned every one of them.

Announcer 1: Yes he has, Dale. Rusty Wallace, as we've seen, doing extremely well after returning to the sport after that completely unexpected and nearly fatal right turn he made at Talladega back in 2007...

*Station Change*